Call In Sick

I might. I just might. Let me tell ya what today (Thursday) was like.

Five 2 year olds, 3 mostly "normalized" (as much as I think they can get). One super sensitive. One grieving, pacifier addicted, blankie addicted, daddy addicted newbie on day #5.

I get my kids up to our room with the help of my untrained, unpaid, very helpful T.A., Crichton (Thank God every day for that kid!), and 4 of 5 girls go to work, one wants to be sad and cry (she doesn't like me at all because I have to help her learn the rules in class while all the other adults she encounters at school just want to help her feel safe and be quiet). Eventually, it was calm. Everyone working, Mrs. Roth had things under control and decided to change diapers and proceed to circle time and snacks.

Crichton's friend M- calls up to him about some cool activity they are doing. Crichton leaves me.

"Wait ... just a minute ... diapers ..." sigh.

Things were calm ... but 5 against 1. I called for preemptive back up.

Preemptive back-up was on an errand for the boss.

(Mental expletive)

Ok. Diaper #1 is full, but all goes well.

During Diaper #2, Sagan and sad girl (A-) start fighting over dolls. "NO! MINE!" precedes the crying, which is quickly followed by screaming. Little girls scream SOOO effing much!

It was downhill from there, folks.

And it leaves me, at the end of the day feeling incompetent. I'm ashamed that I can't keep them and everything together. It's just 5 little kids. But can any one person mind 5 toddlers alone in a school setting? I'm not a bad teacher, right? There's on;y so much one person can do. Kept everyone alive. Unmaimed even. Day was a success.

Took an extra 10 minutes at nap time to watch them breath peacefully.

And felt guilty about it.

Boss was supposed to go to staff meeting, but he had to "run", so it was just me and the directress. I complained and asked for her advice on how to make it run smoother. We put some stairs in my room for climbing. She said if I burn out, I should go to another school; any other place would take better care of me. This was her school and it was bought by a nice guy who is very concerned about bottom lines, just as a business man should be. He added the toddler room before he really had the space set up properly because he had a bunch of customers asking for it. He has 17 two year olds lined up for Fall. And plans to hire another teacher.

Update ... took Friday off. Sorry. Well ... actually, I'm not. Listening to good music and sipping soda as my Motessori'ed kids do the work here at home that interests them. And I have until Monday to recoop.

Exhale.

:)