My whole little family (mom, dad, boys, and baby girl) went to our local swimming pool. We've never done that. It was great! The slope into the water is very gradual, starting at just inches of water and taking like 20 or 30 feet to reach a depth of 3 or 4 feet, then there is the deep end. And they periodically turn on a wave generator. So essentially it is just like the beach, but covered in the winter, with no sand, and no trash or sharks floating around.
What could possibly go wrong?
We were there about 20 minutes, splashing and having a grand time. I look for Canon and see him frozen, looking panicked.
"What's the matter?"
"I have to go to the bathroom."
"Ok, go tell dad! Quick!" (Dad was closer to "shore")
Just then ... plop plop ...
Canon looks at me.
I look at him.
I walk over to Greg and tell him Canon pooped in the pool.
It's one of those moments you know you just have to suck it up and face the music.
I volunteer to tell the life guard. Greg stands by Canon on Doodie Duty. (Like that? I just made it up.)
"I have some bad news. There is poop in the pool." I say, wording it carefully so as not to implicate my own guilt.
"Oh no! Where is it?"
"Over by that guy," I point at my beloved.
She blows her whistle and makes a whirlpool shape in the air ... reminded me a bit of a toilet flushing ...
I'd like to say the lifeguards sprang into action, got the pool cleared and cleaned. But it was another 10 minutes before they whistled and demanded everyone out.
"GET OUT EVERYONE! YOU ARE SWIMMING WITH MY KID'S POOP!!!" I thought to myself. "STERILIZE IT. DISINFECT IT!"
So. They pretty much closed the pool for the night. Because my progeny pooped. In the pool. Sorry, y'all.
On a positive note, Greg sweet talked the front desk girl out of 5 free passes to use at a later date as he signed a form stating our kid pooped in the pool. See we get to relive this happy occasion FOR FREE. Maybe tonight ;)
4 Brilliant Bits of Inspiration:
That video is so much like a prank that I pulled on my family once. We had a dog that would always poop in the house. I crafted a piece of squished brownie into a perfect replica of doggie doodie. It was beautiful! I even had the little bumpy parts and everything. My family was watching the t.v. and I started scolding our dog in the other room. They told me to get a paper towel and throw it away. When I came out with it I sniffed it and said, "Such a shame to waste it" and popped it into my mouth. The look on their faces was priceless.
My DD has to poop everytime her butt hits the cold water at the pool .more than once last summer, I was sneaking into the bushes of a neighbors yard to find a hose to wash doodie from the pool deck (apartments).
So, let me get this straight...you **** in their pool and they gave you 5 free passes to COME BACK?
I've got an idea for a crazy ticket - scalping scheme...
Oh my gosh that's awful!!!! How embarrasing!!!
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