“Happiness and success comes from being yourself, in the most vivid way you possibly can.” Meryl Streep
"Too many people overvalue what they are not and undervalue what they are." Malcolm Forbes
Thursday, August 27, 2009
Growing
This isn't my experience, but I kind of wish it was.
And yet I kind of hesitate to give it to my kids.
2
Brilliant Bits of Inspiration:
Anonymous
said...
Live the life YOU are living. Give the kids the life YOU are giving them. That is what God means for you to do.
I read that blog. It's interesting, but to me, overall, the writer comes across to me as a bit pushy about her views on the way things should be done. Like homebirth. So sorry, but I don't view/promote how my child was born as a badge of honor. Why? Because it's not! And it bugs me when I read women who write about it like it is something to be oh-so-proud of. Like I am somehow 'lesser' of a mother because I got the damn epidural. And you are not better than me because you homebirthed your kids. Well lah-dee-dah, you (or your husband or whoever) got to clean up afterbirth!
I am feeling grouchy and unproductive today....so forgive what seems like public criticism. I really liked her blog, really! I just got turned off by all the yay homebirth! on it because I have read one too many blogs on stillbirth lately that have convinced me never ever to give birth anywhere other than safely in a hospital with lots of doctors and medical equipment around. It also really bugs me when women share stories but in reality get competitive about motherhood in an effort (I guess) to reach out to other women....like her post about her breasts are her superpower because she nursed for years and now they are deflated. Yeah, I get it, "you're great you nursed all your kids, even twins!" but hey, there are some of us out there who can't nurse and who aren't any less super as moms than she is. Am I less super because I had to use a bottle?
Do you get what I'm saying?
I like to read blogs whenever I get a bit bored/depressed and I wish I could step out of my own life. Hers is a type that I look at because it's just so, well, different than my life. Sometimes I wish I picked another path for myself. Like that old Tori Amos song says, "excuse me but can I be you for a while?" But I found my interest turn to annoyance when I read a sample of her posts that started to come across as empathetic but really have a much stronger prescriptive undercurrent to them (like the posts get rid of your TV, what's your masterpiece?, or what's your superpower?)
I prefer posts and blogs that really reach out to people or that in some way really reflect their own personal lives, no matter how quirky they are. If I wanted to get platitudes and advice, I could just read a self-help book. Right? Right?
And that's why your blog is better. It is more individual and reflective of your life, and not just a set of instructions for life in disguise. So there.
Sorry that "anonymous" has issues with me. I'm not offended in the least. I'm curious. And strangely, I think I can empathize.
I once read this chirpy mama book called "Mitten strings to God." This lady had life all figured out. She bugged the crap out of me. I could barely keep reading her tidy advice, her great recipes on homemade crap that I never had time to make, or her reflecting on life's little hiccups.
She didn't have a clue. I was pulling out of an abyss of post partum depression and trying to get a handle on life and what did I need this lady's dumb advice for?
Then I finally reached a chapter in her book where she **didn't** have all the answers. She floundered with disciplining her children and then I realized: She's human, too. wow. And I finally liked her. Is that sick?
PS: My sister and mom loathe home birthers. they think we are CrAzY. I've been through he** and back working through my life choices vs. theirs and their views of me. But they still love me despite my choices. and I love them.
Funny, hb is kind of like home schooling or politics or religion. People get all bent out of shape about it in weird ways. They take offense when none is meant.
When people hb or home school, people sometimes feel somehow "less than." What if, instead of taking offense, we became curious and thought, "Dang, no one could pay me to do that, but what can I learn from this??"
It makes me feel very small and crappy when someone thinks I lord hb over others. It's a great place to be (big sarcasm here).
I sing about hb b/c it is part of me. Something good. And when we experience something good we want to share it, don't we?
For me, because someone else home schools or hb's is fine. I'm comfortable enough in my skin to think, "That's OK." How does that make me or them any less than? It doesn't. That has never been my intention in my blog or in my life.
But at the same time, hb is part of my life's story. It is part of who I am. I own it. I'm not going to **not** share it b/c I'm worried what others will say/think/whisper about me. I'm not in grade school any more.
And back to home schooling: I don't care if women want to spend 100 hrs/week working on cirriculum for their little angels. I, personally, think it's nuts but it doesn't take anything away from me that some mamas do it. In fact, it enriches me, gives me something to learn.
And in the same vein, my hb shouldn't take anything away from you or anyone else. Just as you own your experience which is just as righteous, just as chilling, earth shattering. Just a different flavor. Go and blog about it and romanticize it and we will all read it and weep.
PPS: In the end, can't we all just get along? (sigh) Peace out.
2 Brilliant Bits of Inspiration:
Live the life YOU are living. Give the kids the life YOU are giving them. That is what God means for you to do.
I read that blog. It's interesting, but to me, overall, the writer comes across to me as a bit pushy about her views on the way things should be done. Like homebirth. So sorry, but I don't view/promote how my child was born as a badge of honor. Why? Because it's not! And it bugs me when I read women who write about it like it is something to be oh-so-proud of. Like I am somehow 'lesser' of a mother because I got the damn epidural. And you are not better than me because you homebirthed your kids. Well lah-dee-dah, you (or your husband or whoever) got to clean up afterbirth!
I am feeling grouchy and unproductive today....so forgive what seems like public criticism. I really liked her blog, really! I just got turned off by all the yay homebirth! on it because I have read one too many blogs on stillbirth lately that have convinced me never ever to give birth anywhere other than safely in a hospital with lots of doctors and medical equipment around. It also really bugs me when women share stories but in reality get competitive about motherhood in an effort (I guess) to reach out to other women....like her post about her breasts are her superpower because she nursed for years and now they are deflated. Yeah, I get it, "you're great you nursed all your kids, even twins!" but hey, there are some of us out there who can't nurse and who aren't any less super as moms than she is. Am I less super because I had to use a bottle?
Do you get what I'm saying?
I like to read blogs whenever I get a bit bored/depressed and I wish I could step out of my own life. Hers is a type that I look at because it's just so, well, different than my life. Sometimes I wish I picked another path for myself. Like that old Tori Amos song says, "excuse me but can I be you for a while?" But I found my interest turn to annoyance when I read a sample of her posts that started to come across as empathetic but really have a much stronger prescriptive undercurrent to them (like the posts get rid of your TV, what's your masterpiece?, or what's your superpower?)
I prefer posts and blogs that really reach out to people or that in some way really reflect their own personal lives, no matter how quirky they are. If I wanted to get platitudes and advice, I could just read a self-help book. Right? Right?
And that's why your blog is better. It is more individual and reflective of your life, and not just a set of instructions for life in disguise. So there.
Sorry that "anonymous" has issues with me. I'm not offended in the least. I'm curious. And strangely, I think I can empathize.
I once read this chirpy mama book called "Mitten strings to God." This lady had life all figured out. She bugged the crap out of me. I could barely keep reading her tidy advice, her great recipes on homemade crap that I never had time to make, or her reflecting on life's little hiccups.
She didn't have a clue. I was pulling out of an abyss of post partum depression and trying to get a handle on life and what did I need this lady's dumb advice for?
Then I finally reached a chapter in her book where she **didn't** have all the answers. She floundered with disciplining her children and then I realized: She's human, too. wow. And I finally liked her. Is that sick?
PS: My sister and mom loathe home birthers. they think we are CrAzY. I've been through he** and back working through my life choices vs. theirs and their views of me. But they still love me despite my choices. and I love them.
Funny, hb is kind of like home schooling or politics or religion. People get all bent out of shape about it in weird ways. They take offense when none is meant.
When people hb or home school, people sometimes feel somehow "less than." What if, instead of taking offense, we became curious and thought, "Dang, no one could pay me to do that, but what can I learn from this??"
It makes me feel very small and crappy when someone thinks I lord hb over others. It's a great place to be (big sarcasm here).
I sing about hb b/c it is part of me. Something good. And when we experience something good we want to share it, don't we?
For me, because someone else home schools or hb's is fine. I'm comfortable enough in my skin to think, "That's OK." How does that make me or them any less than? It doesn't. That has never been my intention in my blog or in my life.
But at the same time, hb is part of my life's story. It is part of who I am. I own it. I'm not going to **not** share it b/c I'm worried what others will say/think/whisper about me. I'm not in grade school any more.
And back to home schooling: I don't care if women want to spend 100 hrs/week working on cirriculum for their little angels. I, personally, think it's nuts but it doesn't take anything away from me that some mamas do it. In fact, it enriches me, gives me something to learn.
And in the same vein, my hb shouldn't take anything away from you or anyone else. Just as you own your experience which is just as righteous, just as chilling, earth shattering. Just a different flavor. Go and blog about it and romanticize it and we will all read it and weep.
PPS: In the end, can't we all just get along? (sigh) Peace out.
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