How I Was Taught An Important Lesson After Being Fired As A Primary Teacher

They say "God moves in a mysterious way," but I'm not so sure. I think it's pretty straight forward: Ask and ye shall receive, knock and it shall be opened unto you.

Two Sundays ago, I was released as a Primary teacher, after about 9 years of service in various positions. I had been put in as Cub Scout Pack Committee Chairperson, but I thought it was in-addition-to teaching; I didn't realize it was instead-of. And I've been whining and complaining and feeling generally pissy about it for the last 9 days.

Many people gave me advice and I stewed. About 20 minutes ago, I realized I needed to ACT and move on. But I wasn't sure what the best way to approach it all was. I prayed and waited and thought. Very quickly, the thought came to me that I should read a specific talk I had heard in LDS General Conference. It was given by David Bednar, titled "And Nothing Shall Offend Them." It's not very long and it is full of great wisdom for how to appropriately deal with people when they hurt your feelings. Please read it.

I wrote down what I needed to say to the Primary President and kind of practiced it (as advised, thank you). I called, left a simple voice mail and a few minutes later, got the return call. After the initial phone call formalities, I started crying (cuz I'm a huge pregnant emotional MESS!). I read her my little message: I told her no one had told me I was being released and it broke my heart when it was suddenly announced in church; I told her I'd been thinking about it a lot and I'm so grateful for the opportunity I've had to teach (as advised, thank you) and I realize others need the opportunity to learn like I did, but I just needed to talk to her personally and find out why they kicked me out, that it really hurt my feelings and I was having trouble letting it go without some clarification (as advised, thank you).

She was very sweet about it. She explained that, as she understood it, the Bishop was responsible to inform me of callings and releasings and she was very sorry if they hadn't made it clear that I was being released from one and put in another. She told me they appreciated my service very much, and felt like the cub scouts needed some strong leadership and dependable help, that I would be great in the new position and they wanted to give some other people a chance to be needed at church, too. I apologized for having to call her and get it out, I knew that was likely the case, but couldn't get over my disappointment. She understood and forgave me and apologized and thanked me for calling to let her know how I felt and clearing things up, rather than go on feeling bad and worse. We chatted civilly for a minute and that was that.

Now I can breathe. A little miracle.

Sure, I kind of made a fool of myself, ranting and sobbing over a very tiny prick in my pride, but I pulled that thorn out and I can continue down my path without a limp to slow me down.

Lesson learned: I didn't HAVE to call her ... if I could have forced myself to let it go. She didn't mean to hurt me, I choose to be hurt. That choice, made it impossible for me to truly love and support her as a leader and as a person. I wouldn't let myself give her the benefit of the doubt, I had to confront her and get understanding, and, in personally making that request, I admitted my weakness and immaturity. Change is the ONLY constant in life. It's the silly "Who Moved My Cheese" response. Instead of getting off my butt and getting to work on a new job, I sat around whining and waling that things had changed; that other circumstances, over which I have no control, had effected me with no advance warning. Well, Brandy, dear, that is life. Things happen, all you can really control is your reaction, your attitude. Storms come, people die, children get sick, plans fall through, people forget details. Life is much simpler if you give people the benefit of the doubt and love them anyway; if you acknowledge emotions, determine if they have any valuable information to give, and feel them or let them go; just keep in mind the infinite blessings you have in your life and let the few hard things flow past you. Keep breathing.

You are an ice cream factory!

Life is fairer than we deserve.